Day Four: Racing to Crash

I never know how long the highs will last, an hour.. a day, week, months?? What I do know is that with next to no sleep at all, I start to decline in my ability to think and act after the 3rd day. I also know that I can only go 5 days without sleep before I physically crash. Which isn’t to say that mentally I slow down at all because most often that isn’t the case.

Tonight I am on night 4 and I think I’ve had 4-5hrs of sleep/snoozing in that time. I can feel myself getting annoyed within, like an ache or a craving. This is where I can snap easily in any direction.

I’ve cried too numerous times today to count but over nothing mostly. I’ve cried in laughter also which is rare for me. I’ve been short and direct, borderline snappy all afternoon.

Getting to this stage through a lack of asleep is annoying for me and unfair on everyone who wears the grunt of it, but a person can only keep going so fast, for so long before everything has to stop or come to an end.

Tonight I’m forcing the issue if I can and have taken an extra tablet to wipe me out. As I’m seeing stars, I assume I’ll get to sleep quickly.. I just hope I can stay asleep. Goodnight world.

Published by inknots2day

Hi. My name is Chris but I'd rather be know here by my username; inknots2day. I live in Australia and I suffer from bipolar 1 disorder, OCD and I have been the victim of sexual assault and domestic violence.

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